Ranking My Stature As ‘Nick Martinez’
As I mentioned a couple blogs ago, there are quite a few people with my name. I have taken some time to reflect and do some research on where I am at on the totem pole of Nick Martinez’s out in the world. Here is what I came up with.
7. Fishing Nick Martinez:
Honestly, never thought any of us would be a fish guy, but here we are. I suppose there was bound to be one with an infinite amount of us.
6. Nick Martinez from the Texas Rangers:
Drafted this guy on my fantasy team in 2017 as the prospect of owning the Major League Nick Martinez seemed really cool. Ended up stinking out loud. I’m sure he’s a nice guy, but I would’ve for sure rocked his shit if I got to hit against him.
5. Nick Martinez from Kaiser High School’s Baseball Team:
I got the honor of playing against a fellow brethren during my high school baseball years and was very excited. Stakes were high for a CIF game, but I was more focused on getting the chance to just say hi to this guy than a win-or-go-home game. He didn’t even acknowledge me at any point during the game leaving me incredibly discouraged. If you’re reading this, I apologize for putting your stats up, but I am higher up on the totem pole so don’t really care.
4. Me
I really wish that I could say that I rank higher on this list, but the top 3 Nick Martinez’s are well deserving and it’s a true honor to share a name with them. Those of you reading probably know my strengths (the many) and weaknesses (the few) and how humble I am; so I will let that speak for itself.
3. NicFitsInPics Nick Martinez
Dude is sponsored by Costco, posts sick motivational quotes, and has a nice ass. Tough to beat but somehow gets outdone.
2. Nick Martinez from SAE/The Oasis
I had been confused for this guy a handful of times during my time in the Greek System at CSUN. People would always give me a sad “ohhh this Nick Martinez? I thought they meant the other one.” and then I thought
- 1. Why are you disappointed?? I am the better one???
- 2. I’m gonna have to fight this guy to the death
Then, I finally met him this past year and I must say, I get it. Nick is just a charming, incredibly nice guy and I have to give him his proper dues on this list. Would definitely be disappointed to be seeing me if I expected to be seeing this Nick Martinez.
1. Camping Nick Martinez *NSFW*
This guy is just ahead of the competition. Truly blows all other Nick Martinez’s out of the water. Just really sucks to have to tip my cap to this guy. Perhaps if I work hard enough, I will find my place atop this list some day as even a blind squirrel finds his nut.
If you know of any Nick Martinez’s and think that I need to update this list of Nick’s, please let me know as I can possibly do an annual update.
Songs played while writing:
Bee Gees — Saturday Night Fever [Album]
